'1916 Not to Be Commemorated' by Paul Durcan

The Irish government has announced that 1916

Is not to be commemorated in 2016.

On account of their 150 per cent rollback

Of the principles and ideals of the 1916 rebels,

The authorities wish to proclaim

That they do not cherish all the children of the nation

equally,

That the people have no right to the ownership of

Ireland,

That the people have no God-given right to freedom, 

That the nutrition of good government is inhumanity 

and rapine,

That the testosterone of proper administration is the

pylon and the wind turbine,

That the people have no right to speak 

Other than in celebrity cliché, media jargon,

smart-speak,

That all forms of humane speech are to be outlawed 

In the light of the disgustingly visionary utterances 

Of the poets Pearse, MacDonagh and Plunkett, 

And the gay, casual words of the feckless MacBride, 

That Liberty, Equality and Fraternity

Are prohibited substances in Ireland;

In 2016 anybody caught proclaiming 1916 values 

Will be sentenced to solitary imprisonment for life 

In a windowless room in a ghost estate.

The 2016 logo of Brand Ireland will be 

In fake, high-end Celtic calligraphy:

 UG OV

Signed on Behalf of the Provisional Government 

THE OLD HAG OF BEARE